Starring John Wayne and a cast of hundreds.
In 1958, Howard Hawks was given a strange script with the above title, translated as: Cowboys of Alien River, but he didn’t like the plot, and the cost of all the special effect in the 1950s would have been prohibitive. Hawks only produced good old westerns, with no aliens and no plywood spaceships. So, he gutted the story and changed the title to RIO BRAVO. However, if he would have produced it, read on, as I have discovered some of the lost pages of the script for this offering.
Hawks couldn’t get Daniel Craig who would eventually star in “Cowboys and Aliens” as craig wouldn’t be born until 1968. So, he got John Wayne to play Sheriff John T. Chance. He couldn’t get Harrison Ford to play the boss of the wagon train, because at 16 years of age, Harrison was still in High School at Maine East High in Park Ridge, Illinois, he got Ward Bond instead, to play Pat Wheeler as the wagon master. And of course, every western needs a town drunk that rehabilitates halfway through the story, so hawks talked Dean Martin into playing Dude or as the Mexican community knew him, Borrachón (or drunkard).
As Sheriff Chance’s love interest, Hawks could have gotten Abigail Spencer, however she wouldn’t be born until 1981. That would have been a long wait. So, he got Angie Dickinson, who was 27 and had a waist three years younger than her age; that would be 24inches. Just for the record, here are her measurements: 35-24-36. She played Feathers, a card shark. We’ll talk about some of the other characters as we go along.
Below, is a sampling of the script, from the original typewritten pages, for the movie that was never made: COWBOYS OF RIO ESTRANJERO.
___________________________________________________________________
SCENE 1 – Carlos the barkeep comes running into his saloon, yelling.
“Sheriff Chance, there are aliens from space, and they are taking people to their spaceships. It’s a roundup!
“What in the name of Sam hell are you talking, Carlos?” asks the Sheriff. “What are you babbling about aliens and spaceships?”
“It is true, Señor Chance. They have these flying things all over town and they are taking men, women and children with these ropes with hooks on them and pulling them up into those flying things.”
“Carlos, have you been nipping your Tequila again?”
“Señor Chance, what means nipping?”
“It means, to sneak a drink, Carlos. Well, have you?”
“No Señor Chance, I have not. Why did not you just ask me in the first place, if I have been drinking?”
“Well?”
“No, Señor Chance, I have not been nipping my Tequila. It’s your deputy, Señor Dude, he is the one who has been nipping all my Tequila. That is why all my people they call him Borrachón.”
“OK, Carlos, I’ll have a talk with Dude.”
“Thank you, Señor Chance, but what about the Alien Roundup?”
“I’ll look into that. But first, get Dude and tell Consuela to go find Stumpy.”
“Si, Señor Chance! Ay, Dios…”
SCENE 5 – A wagon train rolls into town, followed by 200 head of cattle, with Ol’ Pat Wheeler in charge. He’s brought along a new hired gun, Colorado, played by 18-year-old Ricky Nelson in his first Movie gig and just old enough to smoke.
“Well Pat, how fast is the kid?” Asks Chance
“Why don’t you ask me Sheriff? I speak English!” Kentucky cuts in.
SCENE 7 – Carlos reports to the Sheriff.
“Señor Chance, Deputy Dude, he is on his way. But I forgot to tell you, a young woman, she came in on the last stagecoach and she got a room upstairs.”
“Who is this young woman, Carlos?”
“She call herself Feathers, Señor Chance.”
“What in the hell kinda name is feathers?” Chance irrupts, “did you ask her what kinda feathers?”
“No, Señor Chance!” Carlos shakes his head. “Just Feathers!”
SCENE 12 – Feathers walks down the stairs at the same time as Dude stumbles in.
“Hey Chance,” Dude mumbles, “I’m no good to you anymore. This morning, I shot myself right in the foot.”
“What in the Sam hell were you doing, cleaning your gun?”
“No, Chance! I was trying to shoot this damned six-foot rat that busted into the jailhouse and I missed.”
“That was no giant rat, Dude! It was probably one of them alien creatures.”
“Look at my hands. They’re shaking!”
“Sit down and have another drink!”
SCENE 24 – The Sheriff finally gets some alone time with shapely Feathers. “Well Feathers, how about we go upstairs and see if your mattress is firm?”
“Why, Sheriff, I’m not that kinda gal!”
“You sure were last night, Missy!”
SCENE 123 – Feathers has to get inside the spaceship and blow it up, rat-looking aliens and all.
“Why do you have to go up into that flying thing all alone?” asks Chance, “let me help you. I’m big and strong.”
“No chance, Chance!” replies Feathers. “You’re older than the saddle on my pony. You’ll just slow me down”
SCENE 124 – Feathers takes off for the mountain. Five minutes later, the Sheriff and a posse, made up of Dude, Carlos, Pat Wheeler, Kentucky, the Burdette Brothers, Consuela and 35 extras, follow.
SCENE 125 – Stumpy finally stumbles into the saloon, just as the posse takes off.
“Gall dang it anyhow,” he swears. “How come nobody around here never tells me what’s going on? Well, I might as well have me a whiskey, or two!”
SCENE 142 – The Sheriff’s posse, the Burdettes’ old gang, Chief Red Cloud and his war party of 47, picked up on the way, go up against the Aliens with their superior weaponry and defeat them and save the civilians that captured in the Alien roundup.
SCENE 143 – Just as the spaceship reaches a couple miles in the air, it blows into smithereens from all the dynamite Feathers and Sheriff Chance had tossed in it before it took off.
SCENE 148 – They all ride off into the sunset, as Dude, Stumpy and Colorado and Feathers sing “Fly Me To The Moon” with Chance on the harmonica and Carlos on the guitar.
THE END
___________________________________________________________________
This would have almost been an impossible movie to make in 1958, had Howard Hawks not rewritten the script, eliminated all the Flying things, the aliens, and the giant spaceship sucking gold out of the mountain as well as 200 pages of the script. Instead, he created RIO BRAVO for the wide screen, running 2 hours and 21 minutes, at a whopping cost of $1.21 Million.
In 2011, COWBOYS AND ALIENS, based on that original 1958 screenplay, was produced by Ron Howard, Brian Grazer, with Steven Spielberg and director Favreau acting as the film’s executive producers, at a cost of $163 Million, with a ton of special effects. Compare that to the $1.21 million cost for Rio Bravo, which at current value only comes to about $10.8 million, in 2020. You would think that this complex Sci-Fi /Western would have been much longer, but it actually runs just a minute under 2 hours.
When RIO BRAVO came out in 1959, I was still attending Berkeley High School, a year away from graduating. Just so you understand my love for the western genre, you gotta know how I got to the USA and where from. We lived in France until 1956 February, when we finally made it here. However, I had by then seen a number of John Wayne Westerns; of course, most of them dubbed in French.
One of those early Westerns I got to see at the Odeon cinema in Algrange, France was “Le Bagarreur du Kentucky” (known in the US as “The Fighting Kentuckian starring, Jean Wayne, with a sidekick played by Oliver Hardy. Some of the other Wayne classics that came to town, were Fort Apache, Red River, Rio Grande, Hondo, and a few others. I was happy that we had made it to the US, so that I would get to see more westerns.
In March of 1959, when RIO BRAVO came out, my father acceded to my request and we all went to see it. Mom and dad loved the movie, as they already liked John Wayne and Dean martin, and they got to know young Ricky Nelson from The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet and Walter Brennon from The Real McCoys . This was unfortunately, the last movie my father would see in a theater, as later on, that year, he passed away at the age of 62.
I have quite a collection of John Wayne classics on DVDs, although, I don’t own every movie he ever made, which is in the neighborhood of 169. But I do have about twenty-five of them. My wife Bonnie and I watch one every so often on a lazy Sunday afternoon while munching on popcorn. Of course, now, with the Corona Pandemic, and the fact that most TV shows are unable to produce new episodes, we get to enjoy more of these old classics from our DVD library.
I hope you realize that this whole cockamamy story about Howard Hawks’ rewriting of COWBOYS OF RIO ESTRANJERO and turning it into RIO BRAVO was just a parody. The actual title of that submission from many years ago was originally, RIO LOCO. Ha, ha, ha!
This piece was certainly not meant to disparage the Duke. On the contrary, it’s an homage to his talent and his ability to draw you into whatever movie he was starring in and I actually believe that if Howard Hawks would have convinced him to play an alien hunting sheriff, Wayne would probably have done it. After all, he did play Genghis Kahn in The Conqueror, and got lambasted for it by the critics and even some fans. It wasn’t really that bad, except, he was way kinda big for a Mongolian warrior. For that matter, he was a truly giant presence on the screen, in whatever role he played. Happy birthday, big guy!