Ever notice how our personal lives sometimes mirror challenges that are happening around us? After all, there is a unifying “thread of life” that connects us with all aspects of nature as well as with one another. So, when worldly relationships and natural disasters rumble around us, it makes sense that we might experience some reverberations in our psyches and in our homes. Can you relate?
I’ll never forget, many years ago, the time period when my father was dying. As you can imagine…this was stressful on many levels for the entire family. I was a meditator at the time and had various stress-managing tools for myself (thank heavens), but even with solid tools, I struggled with painful emotions related to my father’s rapid decline.
Unfortunately, during this challenging period, my dear Sealyham Terrier regressed…to chewing again. He was no puppy, but low and behold, he began to destructively chew things. The finale came when he chewed a chunk off of his thick, hard-plastic, outdoor water bowl. My Sealy left no chunks strewn around the patio, so I knew he had swallowed pieces of the hard plastic.
As soon as I spotted the chewed water bowl, I rushed my little boy to the veterinarian’s office. After examining my Sealy, the vet calmly reassured me that my dog would most likely simply pass the plastic and that I should keep an eye on his “droppings” for the next few days. Oi vey… It was apparent to me that my little guy was “acting out” some of the stress I was experiencing. Thankfully, the vet was right, and my Sealy’s digestive system handled his “bowl-bingeing” episode without any problems. After my father passed away and my emotions began to quiet down, my Sealy’s chewing stopped. No surprise…in hindsight.
Meanwhile, since there are so many stressors in our world today, I want to share a resource with you. It’s a board game that encourages compassionately connecting to others. The game is called the Ungame*, and it’s titled as such because no one wins and no one loses.
I have the version that’s designed for people from 5 to 105 years old. I often play the Ungame for a few minutes with clients during sessions. Doing so allows them to experience it firsthand and see if they want to “gift” their families with this powerful game. As a result, many of my clients play the Ungame regularly with their family members to strengthen emotional connections.
When people play this game together they exchange thoughts, feelings, and ideas. By doing so, they often gain a deeper understanding of themselves and one another. Sometimes, people are hesitant to play at first—not knowing what to expect—but many find it to be a RICH experience…once they give it a try.
The Ungame has questions to answer that encourage participants to express themselves. For example, one question asks, “What are the four most important things in your life?” Another asks you to share a hope about the future, then share a fear. A lighter question asks you to say what your favorite TV program was when you were younger and tell why you liked it.
At one gathering with friends, an Ungame card asked me to describe what my bedroom looked like when I was a teenager. As an adolescent, my bedroom had posters of the Bee Gees up on the walls. I must confess, like a zillion other young girls, I had a huge crush on Barry Gibb. In addition to posters, my bedroom had large, colorful flower decals stuck to the ceiling (since, after all, I was too young to own a VW bug to “flower up”).
Finally, sharing personal stories, thoughts, and feelings with one another can certainly serve as a healthy and fun way to connect. Then, you and your loved ones can trade in connecting to characters on TV for hours at a time…and compassionately connect to one another—for hours at a time.
*The Ungame: www.ungame.com
Certified Clinical Hypnotherapy services in California can be alternative or complementary to licensed healing arts, such as psychotherapy.
Trina Swerdlow, BFA, CCHT, is a Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist, an artist, and the author of the 2-CD Set, Weight Loss: Powerful & Easy-to-Use Tools for Releasing Excess Weight. Her artwork and personal profile are included in Outstanding American Illustrators Today 2. She is the author and illustrator of Stress Reduction Journal: Meditate and Journal Your Way to Better Health. Trina has a private practice in downtown Danville. She soulfully shares her creative approach to personal growth and passionately supports her clients in reaching their goals. You can reach her at: (925) 285.5759, or info@TrinaSwerdlow.com.
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